You Know You Local If..
Sat. 04.24.04 - 1:08 p.m.

Feeling:
Listening:
Quote:

1. You have a separate circuit breaker for your rice cooker/warmer.

2. Only NOW you know that cilantro is the same as Chinese parsley.

3. You measure the water for the rice by the knuckle of your index finger.

4. You know which market sells poi on which days.

5. You know that Char Hung Sut is closed on Tuesday.

6. You can handle shoyu with green mango, li hing gummy bears, raw egg on hot rice and pearl tea (Carnation milk in hot water with sugar) with cr�me crackers.

7. Your refrigerator has a half-empty jar of mango chutney from the 1993 Punahu Carnival.

8. The condiments at the table are Shoyu, ketchup, chili peppeh watah and kimchee.

9. You go to Maui and your luggage home includes potato chips, manju,

cream puffs and guri-guri for omiyage (gifts).

10. You think the four food groups are starch, Spam fried food and fruit punch.

11. A balanced meal has three starches, rice, macaroni and bread.

12. You know 101 ways to fix your rubber slippers...50 using tape, 50

using glue and one using a stick to poke the strap back in.

13. You sometimes use your open car door for a dressing room.

14. You wear two different color slippahs together and you no mind.

15. Nice clothes means a T-shirt without pukas (holes).

16. You are barefoot in most of your elementary school pictures.

17. You have a slipper tan . . . an upside down "v" on top of both your feet.

18. Your only suit is a bathing suit.

19. You drive barefoot.

20. You have at least five Hawaiian bracelets.

21. You never, ever, under any circumstances, wear socks with slippers, or an aloha shirt that matches your wife's muumuu.

22. You still call the Blaisdell Center, the HIC and its Sandy's, not Sandy Beach

23. You say "I going foa lawnmoa da grass" when you mean "I'm going to mow the lawn."

24. You can understand every word Bu La'ai says and you know what his name means, too.

25. You have a sister, cousin, aunty or mom named "Honey Girl" or,

26. Someone in the family named "Boy," "Tita," "Bruddah," "Sonny," "Popo" and/or "Vovo."

27. You still chant "Hanakokolele" when a friend or co-worker goofs up.

28. You say, "Shtraight," "Shtreet," and "Shtress."

29. You say ""Da Kine," and the other person says "Da kine" and you both know what is "Da kine."

30. The "Shaka" and the "Stink Eye" are worth 1,000 words.

31. You're shopping at Epcot Center at Disneyworld and you may say something to your sister and a complete stranger says, "you're from Hawaii, aren't you?"

32. You feel guilty leaving a get-together without helping clean up.

33. The idea of taking something from a heiau is unthinkable.

34. You call everyone older than you "Auntie" or "Uncle" and you kiss everyone in greeting and farewell.

35. You let others cars ahead of you on the freeway and you give shaka to anyone who lets you in.

36. Your philosophy is "Bumbai."

37. You'd rather drag out the compressor and fill that leaking tire every single morning than have it fixed at the local gas station.

38. The only time you honk your horn is once a year during the safety check.

39. If a child needs a home, give him one. He becomes "Hanai."

40. Whenever you meet someone for the first time you ask what year they had grad and where from. After they reply, you say "eh you know so and so..?"

41. Your male best friend's name is either Wade or Max

42. You own two types of slippers: da "good slippas" and da "buss-up/stay home slippas."

43. You don�t understand the concept of North, South, East, and West, but instead give directions as Mauka, Makai, Diamond Head, Ewa, and uses landmarks instead of street names.

44. You buy large quantities of toilet paper in case there�s a longshoreman strike

45. You don�t understand why anyone would buy less than a 20 lb bag of rice

46. You would serve spam as a meat for dinner

47. You know why there�s shoes and slippers outside of front doors

48. You know what Lei Day and Aloha Friday are.

49. You know what is in the big breakfast at McDonald�s

50. You know the difference between being hapa and being hapai

51. You know what it takes to get into kamehameha school

52. You know how to correctly pronounce "Likelike"

53. Someone says the word "uku" and your head starts itching.

54. Your jokes are �bout Portugese not Polish

55. 70 degrees is freezing to you.

56. You use "tako" instead of worms or fluorescent pink fish eggs for bait

57. As a kid, you got lickins� with "da rubbah slippah"

58. You know that "Kukui nut" is not some mental person

59. You�ve given Kahi Mohala�s number out to a guy/girl you didn�t like

60. You call it "saimin" not "Top Ramen�

61. The surf report is on your speed dial

62. "Dressing up" means shorts and an aloha shirt.

63. You say "shave ice", not snow cone or shaved ice

64. You know pineapples don�t grow in trees.

65. When you hear the words fund raiser, you know it means Zippy's Chili

66. Your mouth waters when you hear the words li-hing mui.

67. You know what a plumeria is and which color would die first: yellow, white or red

68. You can live and let live with a smile in your heart.

69. Pau.

previous   next