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stupid stupid girl Feeling: scared as hell I'm in the middle of a freakout session. I wake up this morning... and my "cold sore" is worse. I am SUCH a freak of nature right now and feeling like even MORE of an idiot than i did before. I'm also REALLY pissed. More than likely, at myself. Fuck. I call my mom.. casually say "hey what can i put on a cold sore to make it go away faster." She gives me a bit of advice. I describe it more in detail for her and she says.. That's not a cold sore. That's something else. I quickly tell her "Okay thanks. bye" Not even a minute later, my phone rings. I don't recognize the number, but i answer. It's a guy. Hey, what's up? Military boy always says this whenever he calls so immediately assume it's him and start to panic. I start thinking.. what the hell am i going to say to him. argh! "Who is this?" "guess" "umm.... 'military boy'?" "haha no.. it's Moses" He's actually a REALLY great guy i met at work who asked me to hang out at some point and i gave him my number the other day. But at this point.. it's all i could do to not break out into tears. He just caught me off guard I completely rambled my way through a five minute conversation.. one in which i told him i was thinking of calling in sick for work (to go to the doctor-i didnt tell him why though). He said that he'd done it before and i should be fine. What the hell am i going to do.. God i'm such an idiot. I dont know how many times i've said that this week. but yeah, i'm a damn idiot.
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