Go Away
Thurs. 01.22.04 - 9:58 p.m.

Feeling:
Listening:
Quote:

"If you believe in it you will. Things always turn out ok, just don't stress over it."

Talked to my mom's sister tonight online. That quote was from her. ugh. Part of me hates how i'm shutting everyone out lately.. but then there's this other part of me that just can't deal with anything or anyone right now.

I haven't been calling my friends or returning their calls.. and a few of them have gotten upset with me over it, understandably. But the funny thing is.. i end up not wanting to call them to apologize for my lack of communication because that would mean having to rehash what i've been going through and beg for forgiveness, etc. In all honesty, I just don't have the patience for that right now. I just want to be left alone.. i have things to do. Can't they just do their thing and not get pissy with me because i'm trying to fix my messed-up life? It's not like i won't be back. I will. blahh am i being unreasonable? i don't know.. In all honesty i haven't shut ALL of my friends out. There are a few that i've been talking to every day, in fact. hmm but you know what? Those are the ones that seem to not have a problem with me moving to SF. SO maybe that's what my problem is. I just don't want to deal with negativity. It's bad enough i'm having a hard time finding a room.. but to have to listen to someone tell me yet again "why don't you just stay in SJ?"

For the MILLIONTH time, BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO!

blahhh.

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